More thoughts about building community...
I was talking with someone on IM last night about this whole community-building thing - the obstacles to it, what's worked, what doesn't work...
So, I've been thinking: What are the obstacles to building community?
1. Time - Time is more scarce than money for most people nowadays. People working 3rd shifts. People trying to balance jobs (or multiple jobs), school, kids, family...you name it. How can you make a 'community' time seem valuable enough that people would want to invest their already-scarce time 'investing' in it?
2. Fear/Reservation - Let's face it, some people have been wounded. To risk re-engaging a community on a personal level is a tremendous gamble in the minds of these people.
3. Clique mindset - This one may be my big struggle. A quick survey of how I spend my time, I realize that I pretty much hang out with the same people over and over. Not that that's a bad thing (friendships are great as they deepen), but what have I done to build bridges with people who DON'T have a circle of friends at church...or beyond church?
4. Lack of focus/intent/etc. - I think my own efforts are hurt by this one. If something people are invited to does not seem worth their time, they won't be there. Too much focus, some of these activities become just 'Sunday School' (-shudder-). Too little focus/intent, it's just 'hanging out.' Can there be a balance?
5. Other barriers - Affinity, money, age, family status...whereas I believe some of these things can be legitimate barriers (after all, common interests unite people), sometimes I think they're simply excuses to stay within comfort zones. Not everyone likes the same things. Not everyone has money. Not everyone has kids. But even among some of these dividing lines, I believe people can find common ground to build friendships if they're willing to overlook/overcome these barriers.
I think overcoming these obstacles is something I have to consider as I explore new ideas for building community and the 'reformission' of my small group. It's something we all have to work on, I think, if we want our Christian community to be truly effective...
More thoughts...
The person I talked to last night even validated our IM conversation as legitimate 'friendship-building.' Very true, but...I still believe a gathering of people is an important thing.
Why? Suppose I spend time with person A for an hour. Then I go and spend time with person B for an hour. That's all well and good. But how do I get person A to spend time with person B? Real community begins to build when that sort of thing happens. And if I can get person A and B talking, then WE can start engaging persons C, D, and so on. A 'gathering' - or 'gatherings' - can be a place where this can begin to happen...
Alrighty, taking these barriers and the need for 'gathering' beyond Sunday a.m. into account, again I post the question about what direction to take a small group (mine or anyone's): "How can we deliberately build a community that deepens current friendships, opens doors to new friendships (intentionally), builds each other up spiritually, and does all this in such a way that respects (and overcomes) the barriers to community-building?"
And how do we do this effectively in Decatur (possibly a barrier in and of itself)? Is it a gathering in a home once every week or two? Is it more spontaneous? Both? How do you build a hunger for a deepening community in people?
I'd love to get a dialogue going about this...again... :-)
So, I've been thinking: What are the obstacles to building community?
1. Time - Time is more scarce than money for most people nowadays. People working 3rd shifts. People trying to balance jobs (or multiple jobs), school, kids, family...you name it. How can you make a 'community' time seem valuable enough that people would want to invest their already-scarce time 'investing' in it?
2. Fear/Reservation - Let's face it, some people have been wounded. To risk re-engaging a community on a personal level is a tremendous gamble in the minds of these people.
3. Clique mindset - This one may be my big struggle. A quick survey of how I spend my time, I realize that I pretty much hang out with the same people over and over. Not that that's a bad thing (friendships are great as they deepen), but what have I done to build bridges with people who DON'T have a circle of friends at church...or beyond church?
4. Lack of focus/intent/etc. - I think my own efforts are hurt by this one. If something people are invited to does not seem worth their time, they won't be there. Too much focus, some of these activities become just 'Sunday School' (-shudder-). Too little focus/intent, it's just 'hanging out.' Can there be a balance?
5. Other barriers - Affinity, money, age, family status...whereas I believe some of these things can be legitimate barriers (after all, common interests unite people), sometimes I think they're simply excuses to stay within comfort zones. Not everyone likes the same things. Not everyone has money. Not everyone has kids. But even among some of these dividing lines, I believe people can find common ground to build friendships if they're willing to overlook/overcome these barriers.
I think overcoming these obstacles is something I have to consider as I explore new ideas for building community and the 'reformission' of my small group. It's something we all have to work on, I think, if we want our Christian community to be truly effective...
More thoughts...
The person I talked to last night even validated our IM conversation as legitimate 'friendship-building.' Very true, but...I still believe a gathering of people is an important thing.
Why? Suppose I spend time with person A for an hour. Then I go and spend time with person B for an hour. That's all well and good. But how do I get person A to spend time with person B? Real community begins to build when that sort of thing happens. And if I can get person A and B talking, then WE can start engaging persons C, D, and so on. A 'gathering' - or 'gatherings' - can be a place where this can begin to happen...
Alrighty, taking these barriers and the need for 'gathering' beyond Sunday a.m. into account, again I post the question about what direction to take a small group (mine or anyone's): "How can we deliberately build a community that deepens current friendships, opens doors to new friendships (intentionally), builds each other up spiritually, and does all this in such a way that respects (and overcomes) the barriers to community-building?"
And how do we do this effectively in Decatur (possibly a barrier in and of itself)? Is it a gathering in a home once every week or two? Is it more spontaneous? Both? How do you build a hunger for a deepening community in people?
I'd love to get a dialogue going about this...again... :-)
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