Monday, January 05, 2004

Back2theGrind...

Now it's the first week without a holiday "event" attached to it...I guess that means life goes back to normal. Whatever "normal" is...

Church went well Sunday, in spite of 1.5 AWOL guitar players...(the Root showed up late). There was more energy in the crowd than normal, and our new mix was okay (even with the thundering sound of J-mo's drums, guitar "tunage" issues caused by varying temperatures, and a monitor going on/off). I'm glad it worked out, since we put so much time and energy into everything at Saturday's rehearsal.

Last night, Brian, Amber, Eli, J-mo, and all the young-uns came over for what appears to be a weekly gathering. That's cool with me. It was fun. Brian cooked Spaghetti Surprise (secret ingredient: Bubba Burgers). We all chilled after dinner and watched some TV.

However, I had to disappear for a bit because an old friend of mine called me from Texas. I hadn't heard from him in about 6 months, so it was good to talk to him. In my mind, I've always thought of this guy as someone who is godly and a man of integrity. Now, he is on his own personal road to spiritual "discovery," which can be a good thing...after all, we should NEVER just believe in anything blindly. However, it seems that while on this "road," he's crossed some boundaries that used to be vital parts of his integrity and morality...even as far as experimenting with some hardcore drugs and latching on to a woman who has tested his moral limits.

Okay, okay, I'm not trying to be "holier than thou" or preachy - 'cause it sure sounds like it. But that's not my intention. ALL OF US have probably done things that most people would deem immoral or questionable. But I STILL found his story heart-breaking. After all, this is someone whom I consider a good friend and a former partner in ministry. And it got me thinking about the fact that - lately - I've literally seemed to watch people start to turn AWAY from faith (calling it a spiritual "journey") than I've seen come TO faith.

Don't get me wrong...I LOVE it when people actually want to understand what they believe and why - not merely accepting truth-statements that have been indoctrinated into their heads. However, I believe a faith of integrity and authenticity can only result when the journey is genuine, and not just an "excuse" to test our boundaries. Martin Luther is a good example here. He very much doubted the "ecclesiastical" belief system and doctrine of grace common to the Catholic church in his era. He questioned the system. He questioned the theology. He faced his own overwhelming doubts about his own salvation. But instead of going on a worldy tirade of self-indulgence and doubt-induced "why nots?", he LOOKED FOR God in Scripture and DEEPENED his desire to find the truth buried in the system. And? His legacy is remembered today...he played a major role in the Reformation and helping people realize that God's grace is accessible to all.

My friend's call last night opened up an old wound. Because of the "mess" of the church life we used to be involved in, 2 of my closest friends have pretty much rejected a lot of things about their walk with God they used to deem valuable. The trail of the "wounded" left behind by that experience demonstrates -yet again- that too many churches don't ever look behind them to see what their REAL legacy is. However, thinking about this also makes me feel VERY grateful that - after all I went through as my spiritual world in Birmingham imploded - that I've emerged with my faith intact. I've been through depression... I've questioned why I even do what I do (being a worship leader, that is). But instead of losing my faith, it's been deepened by the experience.

KEY PHRASE: "We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us - they help us learn to endure. And endurance develops strength of character in us, and character strengthens our confident expectation of salvation. And this expectation will not disappoint us. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love." (Romans 5:3-5)

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home