Saturday, June 10, 2006

"Core breach, Captain..."

Ugh.

My stomach hurts. It's been hurting all week. Did someone slip some Colon Blow into my Mountain Dew? Like clockwork, I've been waking me up every morning this week sometime between 4:00 a.m. and 6:00 a.m. and unwillingly doing my best Jeff Daniels-on-the-toilet impression from "Dumb and Dumber," complete with a soprano-like voice... I feel I need roller coaster-like safety bars installed in the bathroom stall just so I can hang on for the ride... I'd name this theme park attraction "Acid Trip" or "Ring of Fire." Heh.

Okay...I've tried to describe my plight without being too gross. And today, it's actually better...but SHEESH!...what a week. Fortunately for me, I'm married to a pharmacist who knew what medications to have the doctor call in for me.

Apparently, I'm not the only one with this affliction at present. Spoke with several people over the past few days who've been suffering the same, as if this is either (1) some strangely persistent intestinal bug or (2) an even stranger manifestation of the collective stress among my friends. Who knows. Still, I'm glad it finally seems to be subsiding a bit.

My only regret this morning is eating grilled hamburgers, corn on the cob, and baked beans for dinner last night... Whoa, nelly... No problems yet (thank God!), but when have beans and corn EVER been anything but a challenge for the intestinal track of the human body?

...

Alrighty, enough...enough... Now that I've grossed you out...

It's supposed to be pretty hot outside today. G-R-E-A-T! I've got a backyard that needs mowing badly (a backyard of record-length Bermuda grass that feels more like a cornfield than a lawn at present), so at some point, I need to brave the heat. May even try to clean off the Mustang (again) and attempt to crank it up if I can find the time.

Preferably, I'll find some time today to take some guitars up to Jack's house and get them setup (action is WAY too low on a couple of them, and taking them to Jack is better than taking them anywhere else).

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